Aging
Sharing Everything
An elderly couple toddled into the local McDonalds and ordered one combo meal. The wife carefully cut the sandwich in two and began to eat her half. The husband respectfully sat and watched. The eating did not progress quickly, and soon the other customers began to notice. Finally one helpful person offered to buy the ... Read More
Signs You’re All Grown Up
Signs you’re all grown up now:
An Old Lady Pfunny
A young man was walking through a supermarket to pick up a few thingswhen he noticed an old lady following him around. Thinking nothing ofit, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkoutline, but she got in front of him. “Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my staring at you ... Read More
White Hair
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out, in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Mommy, why are some of your hairs white?” Her ... Read More
Memories
An elderly couple were having problems remembering things, so theydecided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothingwas seriously wrong with them. They explained to the doctor about the problems they were having withtheir memory. After his examination, the kindly doctor tells themthat they were physically fine. He suggested that ... Read More
Gambling Grandpa
The IRS decided to audit Grandpa, and summoned him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS ... Read More
The Dying Irish Nun
The wise old Mother Superior from county Tipperary was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey they had received as a gift ... Read More
Grandpa Forgot
My grandpa and grandma were sitting on their porch swing enjoying the nice evening breeze, when Grandpa lovingly leaned over and said, “Hey Ma, I’m gonna have some ice cream, would you like some?” “Yeah, Pa, but you’d better write it down or you’ll forget,” said Grandma. Grandpa replied, “I won’t forget.” “Alright then,” said ... Read More
An Elderly Pfunny
Three elderly ladies were discussing the travails of getting older. One said, “Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand in front of the refrigerator and can’t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich.†The second lady chimed in, “Yes, sometimes I find myself on ... Read More