The X(mas) Files

Mulder: We’re too late. It’s already been here. Scully: Mulder, I hope you know what you are doing. Mulder: Look, Scully, just like the other homes: Douglas fir, truncated, mounted, transformed into some sort of shrine; halls decked with boughs of holly; stockings hung by the chimney, with care. Scully: You really think someone’s been […]

A Klingon Christmas Carol

A Christmas Carol from Worf, to the tune of “The Christmas Song”(“Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire”): Phasers flashing in the depths of space,Ripping up an airtight hull;Signs of fear on your enemy’s face,And life support signs reading null!Ev’rybody knows a Romulan’s a spineless foeWho lacks the Klingon will to fight!Phaser beams set his torso […]

Family Feud Answers

Here are some actual answers from contestants who have appeared on the game show Family Feud. Name something a blind person might use: a sword Name a song with ‘moon’ in the title: blue suede moon Name a bird with a long neck: a penguin Name an occupation where you need a torch: a burglar […]

Halloween Rules

=> When it appears that you have killed the monster, *never* check to see if it’s really dead. => Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke. => Do not search the basement, especially if the power has just gone out. => If your children speak to you in Latin or […]

Sith Lord Wanted

Position Available Immediately: Apprentice Sith Lord, Dark Side Consulting Group. An unexpected position has opened up in the Dark Side Consulting Group for an Apprentice Sith Lord. The ideal candidate for this position would like galactic travel and possess a complete understanding of, and competence with the Force, or demonstrate a willingness to learn. Duties […]