pfitz

Cowboy Bets

by pfitz
Two cowboys are riding their horses together on the prairie. They come upon a big pile of manure. The first cowboy goes to the second, “I will bet you a $1000 that I can eat all of this crap.” The second cowboy agrees, so the first cowboy eats the entire pile and wins $1000. The ... Read More

Dinner with Dogs

by pfitz
There were two buddies one with a Doberman Pinscher and the other with a Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says to his friend, “Let’s go over to that restaurant and get something to eat.” The guy with the Chihuahua says, “We can’t go in there. We’ve got dogs with us.” The buddy with ... Read More

Kids Talk about Love & Marriage

by pfitz
Kids’ answers to questions on love and marriage: HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED? HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED? WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON? WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE? WHAT WOULD YOU ... Read More

Limerick by Ogden Nash

by pfitz
There was a young belle of old NatchezWhose garments were always in patchez.When comments aroseOn the state of her clothes,She replied, “When Ah itchez, Ah scratchez.”— Ogden Nash

Not a Great Zoo

by pfitz
I went to the zoo the other day. There was only one dog in it. It was a shitzu.

Fairy Tale

by pfitz
Once upon a time, in a land far away, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped into the princess’s lap and said, “Elegant lady, I was once a handsome prince ... Read More

An Astronomy Pfunny

by pfitz
Scientists have shown that the moon is moving away at a tiny, although measurable distance from the earth every year. If you do the math, you can calculate that 85 million years ago the moon was orbiting the earth at a distance about 35 feet from the earth’s surface. This would explain the death of ... Read More

Gorilla in a Bar

by pfitz
A gorilla walks into a bar and says, “A scotch on the rocks, please.” The gorilla hands the bartender a $10 bill. The bartender thinks to himself, “This gorilla doesn’t know the prices of drinks,” and gives him 15 cents change. The bartender says, “You know, we don’t get too many gorillas in here.” The ... Read More