Military

An Army Pfunny

by pfitz
A drill sergeant had just chewed out a new recruit. At the end of his rant he said, “I guess when I die you’ll come and dance on my grave.” The kid said, “Not me, Sarge. I promised myself that when I got out of the Army, I’d never stand in another line.”

Cool Planes

by pfitz
An F-16 was refueling behind a KC-135 tanker and ragging on the tanker guys about how much cooler the F-16 was and how it could do so much better stuff. The tanker captain said, “Let’s have a contest to see who can do the coolest thing.” So the F-16 went off and did some crazy ... Read More

Humor in Uniform

by pfitz
Some stories from Reader’s Digest’s military humor column. Stationed overseas with the Air Force, my wife and I collected miniature statues. Two of our favorites were replicas of the “Winged Victory” and “Venus de Milo.” When we returned to the States and unpacked our boxes, our attention was drawn to the container holding our collection. ... Read More

Twas the Night Before Christmas – Military Style

by pfitz
‘Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the skies, Air defenses were up, with electronic eyes. Combat pilots were nestled in ready-room beds, As enemy silhouettes danced in their heads. Every jet on the apron, each SAM in its tube, Was triply-redundant, linked to the Blue Cube, And ELINT and AWACS gave coverage so ... Read More

The Old Navy Parrot

by pfitz
The old Navy Chief finally retired and got that chicken ranch he always wanted. He took with him his life-long pet parrot. First morning at 0430, the parrot squawked loudly and said, “Reveille, Reveille. Up all hands. Heave out and trice up. The smoking lamp is lighted, now Reveille.” The old chief told the parrot, ... Read More