pfitz

Interview with the Easter Bunny

by pfitz
With the possible exception of Santa Claus himself, there is not abusier mammal on the face of the earth than the Easter Bunny. Once ayear, the Easter Bunny hops into the home of hundreds of millions ofboys and girls all over the globe, dropping off chocolates, candy andeggs as part of the celebration of Easter. ... Read More

The Hero Lawyer

by pfitz
Did you hear about the lawyer on vacation whose sailboat capsized indangerous, shark-infested waters? He surprised his travelingcompanions by volunteering to swim to the far-off shore for help. As he swam, his companions were startled by the appearance of twodorsal fins — great white sharks, heading straight toward the lawyer.To their surprise, the sharks allowed ... Read More

Not Much of a Man

by pfitz
A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell’sAngels bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old fella,pushed his cigarette into the old man’s pie and then took a seat atthe counter. The second walked up to the old man, spit into his coffee and took aseat at the ... Read More

Vocal Puzzle

by pfitz
Solve the puzzles by saying them out loud, over and over, faster andfaster, repeating the phrase, until you “hear” the answer. Example: LAWN SAND JEALOUS (place) Answer: Los Angeles 1. SHOCK CUSSED TOE (person) 2. SAND TACKLE LAWS (fictional character) 3. MY GULCH HOARD UN (person) 4. MOW BEAD HICK (book) 5. TALL MISCHIEF HER ... Read More

Priestly Assistance

by pfitz
A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a small boy tying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the doorbell is just out of his reach. After watching the boy’s efforts for some time, the priest moves closer to the boy’s position. He steps smartly across ... Read More

World History in a Student’s Eyes

by pfitz
Here is a collection of freshman history bloopers collected by aCanadian history professor (Anders Henrickson) over the years: During the Middle Ages, everybody was middle aged. Church and statewere cooperatic. Middle Evil society was made up of monks, lords andsurfs. It is unfortunate that we do not have a medivel European laidout on a table ... Read More

Virus Alert

by pfitz
This is the big one! Editors note:This is absolutely true. Bill Gates personally called someone that used to work near this other guy’s 3rd cousin-in-law that has a friend whose ex-girlfriend told a buddy of mine’s wife’s brother that he overheard this in the bathroom, and it was just released by Microsoft yesterday. I called ... Read More

Three Irish Brothers

by pfitz
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender asks him, “You know, a pint goes flat after ... Read More

Pop Quiz

by pfitz
(1) There’s one sport in which neither the spectators, nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contestants are finished. What is it? (2) What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward? (3) Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other ... Read More

Memories

by pfitz
An elderly couple were having problems remembering things, so theydecided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothingwas seriously wrong with them. They explained to the doctor about the problems they were having withtheir memory. After his examination, the kindly doctor tells themthat they were physically fine. He suggested that ... Read More