The Procrastinator’s Creed

Procrastinator’s Creed 1. I believe that if anything is worth doing it would have been done already. 2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses. 3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration. 4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion […]

Gambling Grandpa

The IRS decided to audit Grandpa, and summoned him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor was not surprised when Grandpa showed up with his attorney. The auditor said, ‘Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I’m not sure the IRS […]

Marx

A history professor and a psychology professor were sitting outside at a nudist colony. The history professor asked: “Have you read Marx?” The psychology professor replied: “Yes. I think it’s from the wicker chairs.”

Oreo Personality Test

Psychologists have discovered that the manner in which people eat Oreo cookies provides great insight into their personalities. Choose which method best describes your favorite method of eating Oreos: 1. The whole thing all at once 2. One bite at a time 3. Slow and methodical nibbles, examining the results of each bite afterwards 4. […]

Cheer Up

HEY !!! Cheer up… * The parachute company says you’ll get a full refund. * They say the house didn’t float very far at all. * We’re all amazed that you go on living each day. * Well, at least the operation was a partial success. * The “National Enquirer” just loved those nude shots […]