Christmas in the Hood

Twas da night befo’ Christmas and all in the hood
Not a homie was stirring cuz it was all good.
The tube socks was hung on the window sill
and we all had smiles up on our grill.
Mookie and BeBe was snug in the crib
in the back bedroom cuz that’s how we live
and moms in her do rag and me with my nine
had just gotten busy cuz girlfriends is fine.
All of a sudden a lowrider rolled by
Bumpin phat beats cuz the system’s fly!
I bounced to the window at a quarter pas’
Bout ready to pop a cap in somebody’s ass!
I yelled to my lady, Yo peep this!
She said, Stop frontin just mind yo’ bidness.
I said, For real do, come check dis out!
We weren’t even buggin, no worries, no doubt
Cuz bumpin an thumpin’ from around da way
Was Santa, 8 reindeer and a sleigh!
Da beats was kickin, da ride was phat.
I said, Yo Red Dawg, you all that!
He threw up a sign and yelled to his boyz,
“Ay yo, give it up, let’s make some noise!”
To the top of the projects and across the strip mall,
We gots ta go, I got a booty call!”
He pulled up his ride on the top a da roof
and sippin on a 40, he busted a move.
I yelled up to Santa, “Yo ain’t got no stack!”
He said, “Damn homie, deese projects is wack!
But don’t worry black, cuz I gots da skillz
I learnt back when I hadda pay da billz.”
Out from his bag he pulled 3 small tings:
a credit card, a knife, and a bobby pin.
He slid down te fire escape smoove as a cat
and busted the window with a b-ball bat
I said, “Whassup, Santa? Whydya bust my place?”
He said, “Ya best get on up outta my face!”
His threads was all leatha, his chains was all gold
His sneaks was Puma and they was 5 years old.
Santa broke out da loot and my mouf popped open wide.
A wink of his eye and a shine off his gold toof
he cabbage-patched his way back onto the roof
He jumped in his hooptie with rims made of chrome
to tap that booty waitin at home
and all I heard as he cruised outta sight
was a loud and hearty……