A Potato Story

You know that all potatoes have eyes. Well, Mr. and Mrs. Potato had
eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little
sweet potato, whom they called ‘Yam.’

Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told
her about the facts of life. They warned her about going out and
getting half-baked, so she wouldn’t get accidentally mashed and get a
bad name for herself like ‘Hot Potato,’ and end up with a bunch of
Tater Tots.

Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a
rotten potato out of her! But on the other hand she wouldn’t stay
home and become a Couch Potato, either. She would get plenty of
exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.

When she went off to Europe, Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch
out for the Hard Boiled guys from Ireland. And the greasy guys from
France called the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch
out for the Indians so she wouldn’t get scalloped.

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that’s Potato University)
so that when she graduated she’d really be in the Chips. But in spite
of all they did for her, one day Yam came home and announced she was
going to marry Tom Brokaw.

Tom Brokaw! Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset. They told Yam she
couldn’t possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he’s just a…

Are you ready for this?

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Common Tater