Heavenly Horse

A man has been lost and walking in the desert for about five days.One hot day–actually, they’re all hot–he comes to the home of apreacher. Tired and weak, he crawls up to the house and collapses onthe doorstep. The preacher takes him in and nurses him back tohealth. Feeling better, the man asks the preacher […]

Family Bible

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, looking at the old pages as he turned them. Then something fell out, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed in between the pages. “Momma, look what I […]

Children & Prayer

One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was “acting up” during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just […]

Kids in Church

A little girl became restless as the preacher’s sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, “Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?”~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon. “How do you know what to say?” he asked. “Why, […]

Shipwrecked

There were two men shipwrecked on this island. The minute they got on to the island one of them started screaming and yelling, “We’re going to die! We’re going to die! There’s no food! No water! We’re going to die!” The second man was propped up against a palm tree and acting so calmly it […]

Sermon on Lying

A minister told his congregation, “Next week I plan to preach aboutthe sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all toread Mark 17.” The following Sunday, the minister asked for a show of hands fromthose who read Mark 17. Every hand went up. The minister smiled andsaid, “Mark has only […]

The Debate

About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the Jews had toleave the Vatican. Naturally there was a big uproar from the Jewishcommunity. So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debatewith a member of the Jewish community; if the Jew won, the Jews couldstay; if the Pope won, […]

Theme Songs for Bible Characters

Noah: “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head” Adam and Eve: “Strangers in Paradise” Lazarus: “The Second Time Around” Esther: “I Feel Pretty” Job: “I’ve Got a Right to Sing the Blues” Moses: “The Wanderer” Jezebel: “The Lady is a Tramp” Samson: “Hair” Salome: “I Could Have Danced All Night” Daniel: “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” Joshua: […]

The First Church of Football

In a never-ending effort to attract the unchurched, some churches have considered translating their unfamiliar terminology into familiar football phrases: BLITZ: The strategic play that takes place two seconds after every benediction. BLOCKING: Talking endlessly to the pastor at the church door and keeping everyone else from exiting. COACH: The children’s Christmas program director. ASSISTANT […]

Religious Cowboy

The devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range. Three weeks later, a goose walked up to him carrying the Bible in its mouth. The cowboy couldn’t believe his eyes. He took the precious book out of the goose’s mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, “It’s a […]