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- You’d never be expected to make the coffee.
- There’d be no more early morning decisions about what to wear to the office.
- You could grow a gut the size of Fat Albert’s and consider it a job requirement.
- One big black belt – accessorized for life!
- There’d be no reason to have your colors done.
- Everyone would be extremely nice to you, even if you weren’t.
- Should people suggest your belly jiggled… that is when you giggled… like a bowlful of jelly, you could hit them with your purse.
- You’d always work in sensible footwear.
- There’d be no need to play office politics; a hearty ‘Ho! Ho! Ho!’, would remind everyone who’s boss.
- You wouldn’t need an expensive briefcase.
- No one would dare ask for a ride to work.
- Never again have to wear pantyhose or worry about your slip showing.
- No more trips to the vending machine… you’d just snack on milk and cookies all day.
- You’d never be asked to take an early retirement package.
- Juggling work and family would be a breeze because your children would adore you; even your teenagers would want to sit in your lap.
- You’d be guaranteed the best chair in the office.
- Age discrimination wouldn’t be an issue.
- You’d never grab the wrong coat on your way out the door.
- No one would ask to see your job description.
- Your co-workers would be on notice that they’d better not pout.